Tragedy as a Wake-up Call

[Danielle]

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[TAE]

This is some real food for thought, the idea of shifting from fuck this to how do we heal this. For me there's the issue of anger/rage. You have the trauma and abuse of oppression, and the resulting anger that is justified.

So when I hear the language of love and empowerment I get it but I also don't want to dismiss or diminish or shy away from the anger and rage. And I feel like that's where a lot of people, at least some of the activists I've known, get turned off. I've been accused of being too love and light so I feel like I can get where you're coming from concerning unity and healing but then I also can see that other side of the coin where it's like no, FUCK that.

To your question of how do we teach people to heal on a large scale, I'm not saying this is THE answer but in my opinion one key is teaching people how to process anger/rage, how to be with and honor and respect and feel the anger/rage and how to hold space for the anger/rage of others, how to listen to it and through it. I also think that this is key in fostering connection especially with groups who stand on opposing lines. So essentially a restorative justice framework.

[Danielle]

Yes! The anger is real and justified.  So much anger and rage from this damage from fear.  How do we channel the anger into something productive?

Another big question. How do we teach empowerment without having it come off as victim blaming? I can already hear the accusations.  To do this well, words have to be carefully and judiciously planned out.  

Perhaps the empowerment needs to be a protective sort. A calling not to threaten anyone else, but to stand tall and proud. Claiming our space. Demanding to be recognized as sacred while recognizing others as the same.  Showcasing healthy and necessary boundaries.  

Restorative justice.  Whew chills.  This has been big on my mind for a while. A week ago, my 5 year old got a lesson as well.  My parents had bought my son a police and criminal LEGO set for play at their house.  He’s been playing get the bad guy, unbeknownst to me. So I took some breaths and used it as a learning opportunity.  We took the “criminal” which I relabled as the “good person who chose a bad behavior” to the doctor goddess (cousins old vet Barbie set) and we hypothesized why he might have acted out in that way.  She utilized energy healing and he went to school.  The game ended in the officer and the good guy delivering food to hungry people out of the “food truck”.

In an actual restorative justice movement, how do we infiltrate the current system?  

What comes to mind for me is middle and high school level.  Perhaps traction could be gained over ending school shootings.  There are so many avenues.  I would love to come up with a response protocol that fits a wide range of atrocities.

Thank you for your inputs.  I look forward to where this is going.

[Irene]

Thank you for this thread. I am so here for this conversation. I agree, with just a shift in the thinking from resistance to empowerment we have a whole new opportunity for healing instead of just fighting.

The lesson you have shown your son is beautiful and transformative <3 Maybe the action starts at that level as well. Where are all the places in our lives we can fit in teachable moments like this for youth?

Validating emotions of fear and anger but not acting from this place is something we have discussed in class and especially in Hasnaa's most recent diary post - the July community meeting (which is also very relevant to this conversation). And yet it is not discussed in this way in the activism community--or at least not in the mainstream-- as far as I have seen. The word forgiveness is thrown around but fear and anger are ruling (and it's understandable!).

How do we make forgiveness a real-world practice? And when we do so, how to we protect the vulnerable and carry out protective empowerment as you mentioned? Healthy boundary modeling was transformative for me, and I see how it is transforming those in my life as well. I love the idea of making it part of "protocol."

I am fully listening to this convo. and very inspired. Thank you again.

ETA: I wrote this response very quickly because I was excited. I may add more later lol.